nappylove

Blog Links?!

I'm trying to put together a list of links specifically for nappy blogs.  So if you have a nappy blog, email me your links so I can add you to the list!

Why did I choose to take them down?

I used to work as a bank teller.  About 3 years ago, long before I had even considered going "loose," I had a customer ask me about my hair.  She was a young black woman that liked to wear this cute little curly wig and as I'm counting out her paycheck on the counter, she asked, "How do you discontinue them?"  I was confused.  Discontinue what?  "Well," she continued, "How do you take them out?"

Okay, I understood.  It seemed like once my locs grew to shoulder length, I started getting more and more comments about how pretty my hair would be if was straight.  I explained to her that you have to cut your hair (going on the info I had at the time), that there was no way to "discontinue" locs.  She picked up her money and shook her head (one of those "damn shame" head shakes) and said, "Well, that would have been the whole point of getting them, so I could grow my hair out."

I always wished I would have said something like, "No, you're missing the point," but I didn't.  But I'll say it now.  If anybody is getting locs to grow their hair to shoulder length or bra strap length or ass length just to pick them out and enjoy long flowing hair, they're missing out on a wonderful experience that is just about enjoying the process.  And since long flowing hair probably ain't gonna happen anyway (due to shed hair, breakage and pure nappiness), they're probably wasting their time as well.

Growing locs was probably--those were the best years of my adult life.  I had an awesome loctician that became one of my best friends. During this time, I met my boyfriend; I started writing again.  Y'all.  I fell in love with me. 

And that's at least part of the reason why I didn't want to cut my locs off and toss them in a large Ziploc bag somewhere.  Silly as it may sound; I wanted to keep some part of that experience.  It was right for me.  And I don't regret it.

Of course, that's only half of the story.  When I first went natural, I only stayed a loose nappy for about 4 months.  Less than that, actually.  And then I was locked. Again, it felt right at the time and I have no regrets, but knowing that I had never experienced my hair in it's natural state for more than a couple months was also a deciding factor in my decision to pick my locs out instead of cut them off.

Since I went natural, I've gotten some off the wall comments.  I've been called lazy, cheap, unprofessional and my favorite: "too pretty to wear your hair like that."  Someone told me (which I thought was rather bold) that I obviously had too much time on my hands to go through all the trouble to taking my locs down.  Whateva.  When I took my locs out I had a job, I was a full-time student and mama, I was in a relationship and I was finishing up a manuscript.  What folks consider a "waste of time" is relative to that person.  I picked my hair out while I was helping the kids with their homework, or when I was reading or studying or watching TV. 

I've been "loose" for almost a year now. I experienced so many ups and downs, growth, breakage and split ends, not to mention my rudimentary styling attempts.  I discovered henna and Qhemet, Nexxus and Trader Joe's (stuff I never paid attention to as a low-maintenance locked head).  It was NOT easy, but I've been loving this chapter of the journey.

Scissors starting to look real good...

to a sista right now.  I saw this commercial the other day. I forget what it was for, but the woman had a really nice twist-out, maybe about 5-6 inches. I don't know, I've been thinking about changing up a little.  I've even been considering locking again.  This winter weather has been brutal; I have so many split ends it ain't even funny.  I've been wearing 2-strands since the end of January and it's still too cold to wash and go.  I've decided not to do anything until Mother's Day.  Maybe by then I'll know what I want to do.

Bri and I are still working on her locs. She actually learned to to pick one out herself. It seems like it's taking longer, because her locs are thinner and there are so many of them.  At least they are shorter than mine or Liv's were--it's different too because Bri's locs were latchhooked.  With mine it was more like I was detaching the hairs from each other, her locs have to be unraveled.  She's excited, and hopefully, we'll have it done by her birthday in May.  She'll be 11 (I'm seriously trying to cope with the fact that my daughter may possibly start menstruating soon.  It's freaking me out!).

Thanks, you guys, for your encouraging words. My boyfriend and I were best friends.  I think that was the worst part, thinking that I couldn't just call this person up and say whatever.  He and I are okay now--not back together, but I didn't lose my best friend either.  I'm just going to use this time to work on me.

Ciao

Here we go again...

Yes, I've been MIA lately.  I don't know, I guess I have good reasons.  My boyfriend and I broke up (after 5 years), I'm still waiting on my grad school apps to come back (trying not to stress--and failing) and I've been watching Good Times non-stop, which, now that I think about it, is really depressing.  Hair has been the last thing on my mind.

I finally got Liv's hair down from those microbraids.  It took me forever and I will not be doing that again any time soon.  It was cool while her hair was in the braids, because I didn't have to be bothered with it, but the take down--jeez.  Bri has decided that she doesn't want locs anymore.  She told me she wants me to take them down, and I really didn't think it was possible, since I latch-hook her locs, but she begged me to try it, so I did and lo and behold, I got that sucka down.  I was surprised.  So far, I've taken down 3 locs in different parts of her head, just to make sure that one wasn't a fluke.  So, I guess I'm doing it again.  Damn.

The weird thing about her locs is how much lint they have collected.  She's only had locs for a year or so, but almost all her locs have little lint balls at the root.  I don't know if it has something to do with her hair being latched--maybe I wasn't tightening them enough, I don't know.  I'm trying to wrap my mind about the long tedious process that I have to endure AGAIN.  Hopefully, I can have it done by the summer.

As far as my own head, I bought some Keraphix the other day.  I was really trying to let the Nexxus go, since I'm trying to be all-natural and all that, but, uh...I really like it.  The last couple times I've hennaed my hair, it started to break off and my souped up Trader Joe's wasn't cutting it.  The Humectress saved me.  I think I'm going to start doing henna glosses (with Trader Joe's) and stop doing the full application.  I think it was the lemon juice I was using that made it break off, so I'm switching to all ACV from now on.

I'm still wearing two-strands with braided roots.  I'm scared to take them down though, because I feel like cutting it and it's probably best that I keep my hands out of my hair for now.